Loss
by whatevverr
Summary: When Edward loses his mother, he relies on Bella for strength. But how long can she help?
1. Comfort

Bella's POV

I couldn't handle this. It just wasn't fair. Edward was the kindest person I knew, and yet, he had to go through one of the hardest things in life. He had just lost his inspiration, his hero. His dear, sweet mother. She was a saint on earth. She spoiled him, he was her only son. Edward just sat on the couch with me, never making eye contact. I put my arm around him, in an only friendly way. We were just friends, but the thought did cross my mind. He was incredibly gorgeous. He seemed to be grateful I was there. He was terribly depressed, even though he managed to keep a strong face.

I had spoke too soon. He collapsed in my arms, crying like crazy. He had finally broken down. I wanted to say something, in hope that it would help, but i just couldn't think of any words.

"It's going to be alright. I'm here, I'm here," was the only thing I could say, even though it wouldn't do anything for him.

Edward was never going to be the same. It was a fact. When my grandmother died, Edward comforted me. And I knew, that I never was the same. I still shed a tear once in a while, although the loss of a grandmother, in old age, didn't come close to the pain that Edward's loss brought. His mother was still young, and no one expected her to die. I didn't know any details, but I did know that she was hit by a drunk driver.

"It just. Isn't. Fair!!" He broke out in between sobs.

He had read my mind.

Edward's POV

It was a month after the accident, and I had to go to school sometime. I just didn't want that sometime to be now. Bella was my only comfort. My best friend had gone with me through everything, including this. She was the only reason I was even doing anything. Yes, I admit I was still extremely troubled regardless. I had started drinking, even though it was not legal yet. I was only 19. I had also gotten into a habit of drugs. It was stupid, and my mother would be ashamed, but I didn't care. Alcohol, numbed the pain, and the drugs brought happiness, even though it wasn't real. I had to constantly remind myself artificial happiness was better than no happiness.

The kids in the neighborhood thought I was crazy for two reasons. One, I had resulted to horrible things to ease my pain, and I started being a jerk. And two, that I didn't make a move on Bella. She was gorgeous. Anyone who had any sense knew that. But Bella was my best friend, and I couldn't risk my friendship. Anyway, I didn't have any feelings for her like that. Right on time, I heard a knock at the door.

"Come in!" I yelled, not surprised when Bella walked in.

"Hey Edward.I was on my way to school, and I was wondering if maybe you would like a ride." Edward, that was weird. She had grown a custom of calling me Edweird, but since the passing, she has stopped.

"Yeah, that would be great. Take a seat," I told her, even though she had already sat down.

"Eddie!," I hated that more then Edweird,"What the hell is this Edward?"

I peeked my head through the door, to see that she was holding up a bag of marijuana that I had stuffed into one of the couch coshions . "Ed, what the hell? I know your upset and all, but this is so stupid!" She was beginning to piss me off.

I walked into the room, with a beer in hand, as a watched her chocolate brown eyes bulge out of her head.

"Edward, what the hell? Your not old enough!"

"Shut up! Get off my case, and stop acting like a bitch!" I felt sorry right away, but was too angry to show it. Lately I got angry at everything, and when I had reason to be angry, I was super angry. Before I knew it, I had smashed my beer bottle on the table, sending glass shards everywhere. Bella ran out of the apartment, with a very angry face. I guess she wasn't going to give me a ride to school.

Bella's POV

He was an absolute jerk. I didn't care if his dad trusted him to live alone, what he was doing was stupid. His words cut me like knives. I couldn't believe he called me a bitch, after all I had done for him. I was just trying to protect him, and what he was doing would come and bite him back in the ass.

School that day went by slow, slower than usual. Edward's words kept ringing through my head. I walked out of class, shot out of my thinking session to hear my phone ring.

"Hey It's Bella. Talk to me."

"Bella?"

"Carlisle? What's up?" Why was Edward's dad calling me?

"It's Edward. He was admitted to the hospital. Alcohol poisoning." He sighed.

"What?" I was extremely nervous. "I'm on my way."

END CHAPTER ONE!


	2. More than you think I do

Chapter 2

Edward's POV(in coma, thinking.)

Where am I?

Where is my Bella? Wait Ed. Your Bella?

"Hi Ed." There she was.

"Um, you probably can't hear me right now." Wrong.

"And I'm sorry for telling you what to do." Don t be sorry. I should be sorry.

"Please wake up. Things just aren't the same without you."

That's when I knew. I loved her. More than just a friend. Whenever she laughed, my heart missed a beat.

Right now, I wanted to reach out and touch her.

I tried. And tried. And Tried. Finally, I opened my eyes.

Bella POV

Then it happened. He opened his beautiful green eyes, and gently stroke my face.

Wait. Beautiful? Had I just said that?

"Hey Edweird," I said without thinking. I expected the face of death, but was surprised when I was greeted with a huge grin. My favorite crooked grin. Once in a while, he showed glimmers of his old self. It's like a little light in a dark cave. Miniscule, but it brings a flash of hope.

"Bella."

"So how are you feeling?" I asked, even though I knew the answer.

"Well, as good as someone can feel in a hospital," he chuckled.

"You should get some rest so you can go home."

He had the look of guilt on his face. "Um, Bella, I don't think I'm going to go home. I think I'm going to ask to move in with my grandparents."

"Why?" I wondered, "What about carlisle?"

"He isn't stable. He is falling apart. And I'm not helping any either."

I felt sorry for him. Feeling that he needed to leave for his dad's sake.

"Please don't. I'll miss you so badly." There was a great amount of truth behind my words.

"Well. Maybe I'll stay. For you. Anyway, you wouldn't be seeing me much anyway. Carlisle thinks its best to send me to rehab." He sighed. This was obviously hard for him. "Anyway, I don't think I'm going to get out. I think I'm going to die."

Die? Alcohol poisoning wasn't that extreme.

"Going to, or want to?" I knew the answer when he blushed. He ran his hand through his messy bronze hair.

"The latter." That was all he said before he closed his eyes and fell asleep. He looked so peaceful, so much like a child.

I hadn't even noticed a nurse walked through the door. "Miss, visiting hours are over. You can come back tomorrow though." I nodded and stole one last look at Edward before walking out the door.

I went home, and went upstairs to do my homework. Before I could start, my cell phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Miss Swan?"

"Yes. This is her," I answered

"We wanted to tell you that Edward Cullen has been screaming your name in his sleep. He has also been crying in his sleep. This isn't good for him, or our ears, so we were asking if you could come and calm him down." I was surprised. Screaming my name?

"I'll be right over," I said as I hung up the phone.

Geez. I'd be paying for a lot of gas today. I hopped into my old truck and drove back to the hospital.

"Miss Swan. Thank you. Come with me." I was greeted by a doctor with a round face.

"Bella. No. Not you too. NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" Edward was tossing and turning, and yelling.

I felt a tear trickle down my face. Those damn tears always betrayed me.

"Edward. Wake up. It was just a dream. I'm here. Its Bella." At this, Edward opened his eyes.

"I had a horrible dream. You were dead." His voice cracked on the last word.

"It's OK. It was just a dream. I'm here, I'm here."

"Miss Swan, I would like to see you outside in the hall." Was I in trouble?

"Yes Doctor?" I said as we walked into the hall.

"That boy loves you."

"I know. He's my best friend. He is like my brother. We always say love ya to each other. " Why was the doctor telling me this?

"No. Not like that. He started screaming I love you, I love you, I'm in love with you." His last sentence startled me. IN love? Well that meant..... NO! He was my best friend.

"Well. We have to tell you to leave. Visiting hours are over."

"Can I say bye to Edward?"

"Yes, of course."

I walked into the door, and Edward immediately smiled.

"Hey. I have to go, and sleep well. K?"

"Yes I promise,"he sighed.

"Love ya. See ya later."

"Love ya too," he said as I walked out the door, and I swear I heard him mutter, "More than you think I do."


End file.
